ADULT IMPACT: you might struggle with or fear conflict. You may not know how to take responsibly for your own behavior, or become extremely emotionally activated when things don't go as planned.
When you experienced something hard or stressful, a parent always made the issue about them or how it made them feel or how it affected their own life
ADULT IMPACT: you might struggle with empathy (the ability to put yourself in another persons perspective), might center conversations around your experience, or chronically give unsolicited advice.
Your parents confided in you about their relationship problems, sex life, or work issues when you were a child because they didn't understand that wasn't appropriate developmentally.
ADULT IMPACT: you might struggle with boundaries, may overshare information, or take on a "caretaker" or "therapist" role in your relationships.
You feel very frustrated + like things are one sided when you talk to them (ex: you share something important to you + they change the subject or talk about themselves)
@the.holistic.psychologist
ADULT IMPACT: you might find yourself in relationships with people who are emotionally unavailable or dismissive because you've never had relationships with people who were able to meet your emotional needs or hold space for your own experiences.
A parent regularly invalidate your feelings or experiences "well, some people are starving" "could be worse" "that didn't actually happen.
ADULT IMPACT: because your reality has been consistently invalidated, you might struggle with trusting yourself.
Your parents have told you that you "owe them" or that you need to do things for them because they sacrificed to raise you. They regularly use guilt or shaming.
ADULT IMPACT: you might become a chronic people pleaser or feel a lot of pressure to meet your parents needs (something you've done since childhood.)
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