10 Gottman Relationship Ideas

 

Gottman... "What Works in Relationship Practice"

1. Do a weekly check in. (link) Start with 5 appreciations (there's a handy 'characteristics bank').  
2. Plan date nights.  (link to recent blog post)
3. Do Things together.  (link to recent blog post)
4. Create Shared Meaning. (link to recent blog post)
5. Build Love Maps.  How well do you know your partner’s inner world, their history, worries, stresses, joys, and hopes?  Build Love Maps is the first floor of The Sound Relationship House. The concept is simple: you and your partner should know each other intimately.  Emotionally intelligent couples are familiar with each other’s worlds. They remember major life events, and they keep updating their information as the facts and feelings of their partner change.
6. Make Life Dreams Come True. (link) You and your partner should create an atmosphere that encourages each person to talk honestly about their hopes, values, convictions, and aspirations. (link to recent blog post)
7. Express Gratitude and Appreciation. (link to recent blog post)
8. Six Second Kiss.  (link to recent blog post)
9. The Magic Ratio.  Successful couples have a 5:1 ratio of positive interactions.  Be interested, express affection. demonstrate they matter, intentional appreciation, find opportunities for agreement, empathize and apologize, accept your partner's perspective, make jokes
10.   Magic 6 Hours a Week.   Partings. Reunions. Appreciation and Admiration. Affection. Date Night. State of the Union Meeting.

Also: The four things all successful relationships have in common (link to recent blog post)

Also: How to do Valentine's Day, which reinforces many of these ideas.  (link)