Gottman - Make Life Dreams Come True

 GI:

What are your life dreams? As you imagine the future, who do you want to be? What do you want to achieve? 

Does your partner support your dreams? Do you support theirs? Have you determined any shared goals you’re working towards as a couple?

These questions are all part of Make Life Dreams Come True, the sixth level of The Sound Relationship House. 

Make Life Dreams Come True means that you want the best possible life for your partner and you are willing to do what it takes to make that happen.

You and your partner should create an atmosphere that encourages each person to talk honestly about their hopes, values, convictions, and aspirations. 

When you make space for these things in your relationship, you can reach your individual and shared goals with the support of your partner, and that’s the best part of making your Sound Relationship House your dream home.

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Talk about life dreams: Create an atmosphere that encourages each person to talk honestly about their hopes, values, convictions, and aspirations.  

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What are your life dreams? Do you know what your partner’s dreams are? Do they differ from yours?

Envisioning your life together isn’t something that you do one time. No matter how long you’ve been together, you can always share new hopes and dreams about your future.

Find time to sit down with your partner and ask them to think about their dreams in life. You may find you share some of those dreams with them, and you may find that your partner’s dreams differ from yours. Discuss how each of you can support the other in their life dreams. 

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A Lifetime of Love

Honoring each other’s dreams is the secret ingredient to creating love for a lifetime. 

Life dreams are things you've always wanted to do like opening a business, taking kickboxing classes, learning how to knit, or traveling to Italy. 

Each of your dreams is important and deserves to be shared with your partner. When you hide your dreams, big and small, you hide the most important parts of yourself. You block intimacy and connection. 

Instead, be open and honest about your dreams and respect and honor your partner’s dreams, even when they’re different from your own. Honoring your partner’s dreams is a potent way to show your love for them. 

Be curious. Ask them what their dream means to them. There is a story within every dream you have and within every dream your partner has. Listen to each other’s stories.

To become a dream team, ask each other these open-ended questions around dreams: 

• What are your three most important life dreams? Why are each of them important to you?
• How can I support you in your dreams?
• How would you feel if your most important dream was fulfilled? If it wasn’t?
• What dreams can we share?