Here's a helpful slideshow about using IFS relates to eating disorders. Here's an intro from Pscyhology Today. And here are 5 things I learned.
1. What is it? Internal Family Systems (IFS) is an approach to psychotherapy that identifies and addresses multiple sub-personalities or families within each person’s mental system. These sub-personalities consist of wounded parts and painful emotions such as anger and shame, and parts that try to control and protect the person from the pain of the wounded parts. The sub-personalities are often in conflict with each other and with one’s core Self, a concept that describes the confident, compassionate, whole person that is at the core of every individual. IFS focuses on healing the wounded parts and restoring mental balance and harmony by changing the dynamics that create discord among the sub-personalities and the Self. Parts take over when they do not trust the self. When trauma occurs early in life, Self may not be present or able to protect the system. Parts get stuck at younger ages and keep doing the jobs they originally showed up for.
2. How it works. IFS was developed in the 1990s by family therapist Richard Schwartz, Ph.D., who developed the concept of an undamaged core Self that is the essence of who you are, and identified three different types of sub-personalities or families that reside within each person, in addition to the Self. These include wounded and suppressed parts called exiles, protective parts called managers, that keep the exiled parts suppressed, and other protective parts called firefighters, that distract the Self from the pain of exiled parts when they are released. For example, an exiled part may be the trauma and anger of earlier abuse, emotions that are suppressed by the manager, while the firefighter may be an alcohol addiction or behavior such as overeating that distracts the client from facing and re-experiencing those uncomfortable emotions.
3. What does IFS therapy look like? IFS is talk therapy in which you work with a therapist to identify and understand the specific sub-personalities or families that make up your internal mental system. Once you identify these parts, the therapist will help you acknowledge your feelings about these suppressed emotions, learn how to release these feelings so you are freer to address the actual problem, and ultimately find more positive ways to manage conflicts on your own. The therapist may suggest certain tools to help you do this, such as relaxation exercises, visualization, keeping a journal, and creating a chart that illustrates the relationship between Self and the different parts of you. In therapy, you can ask the manager: what is your job? what would happen if you didn't do your job? If you didn't have to have this job, what would you rather do? If you could do your job (usually protection), without (usually controlling), would that be OK? (same for firefighters). "So, the part of you that can't stop eating is trying to numb the pain. Sounds like it's been working really hard to help youy not hurt so much. If that part could help you heal the pain, and have a healthy body, how would that be?" Depressed parts feel utterly hopeless and have blended with and overwhelm the system. This may be the result of a protector (exiling) parts. This takes so much life-force energy that there is little left for anything else. The goal is to learn the part's story, develop a relationship between the part and Self and have Self provide Hope.
4. The Self is the "seat of consciousness" and self-healing. It is characterized by the Cs: calm, clarity, curious, creative, confident, courageous, compassionate, connected
5. Exiles hold the memories, sensations, and emotions of prior painful events: hurt, pain and shame, guilt, abandonment (never felt loved or protected) of the past; want to be seen and heard; protectors are worried their distress will overwhelm the system. Exiles crave redemption from the person who hurt them or reminds them of the one who caused the hurt. Mangers run daily life, are proactive, want us to look good, striving, achieving, pleasing, perfectionism, caretaking of others, critical and judgmental (of self and others) , anxiety, worry , apathy, pessimism, passivity; they work to contain the exiles by staying in control of events and relationships. Firefighters are reactive and will work to put the fire (pain) out when a triggered exile erupts past a manager. They are parts that react when exile pain is activated in effort to distract or extinguish their feelings or dissociate the person from them. Drinking, drugs, eating, and all addictive behaviors; self-harm, suicidal ideation, rage, violence, impulsivity, dissociation. (socially acceptable firefights: TV, internet, computer games, shopping, sarcasm, exercising, sleeping, working, flirting; sociall unacceptable: addition, affairs, rage, violence, abuse, stealing, cutting, anorexia,). The goal of managers and firefighters is to "never again" let you feel the pain. They don't trust that the exiles won't overwhelm the system. They don't trust that Self can take care of the system. What managers and firefighters say to each other: managers: don't you ever stop and think? You are totally out of control! You should be ashamed of yourself! You are hopeless! firefighters: fuck off! I desrve this! try and make me! I don't give a shit! Watch out!
Even the worst impulses and feelings -- the urge to drink, the compulsion to cut oneself, the paranoid suspicions, the murderous fantasies -- spring from parts of a person that themselves have a story to tell and the capactiy to become something positive and helpful to the client's life. The point of therapy isn't to get rid of anything but to help it transform.
Richard Schwartz
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